- April 12th, 2010
I've just realised, I'm dead in the middle of a manic phase. I've been calling people constantly, several times a day at least. I've been more forgetful than normal, and I've been so involved in my own head I can't believe it. My web browser is open with hundreds of tabs, from graphic imaging tutorials to sewing machines for sale, and then about 30 or so for courses at uni I want to do, but I know I couldn't handle any of them. Still, though, I'm planning on trying, at least for a few. The last three weeks have been a blur, I can barely remember anything of it. Now, it's almost midnight and I've just woken up again, put the heater on, and started drawing. My head's racing and screaming at my in three different languages, and my skin is buzzing. I realise just now, I told someone that, yesterday. The skin, buzzing. I don't recall who I was speaking to.
I want to buy things. I want to be away from here, invisible to everyone who exists outside my head. I want to experience everything, but I can't even begin.
I'll stop now. I just had to write it down. I'm still babbling at the keyboard...